Day 8

Life has been... weird. I've finally gotten some of my responsibilities delegated or moved to a later date so that I can have more time to relax. Yet I still don't feel relaxed because I spend my extra time just playing Deadlock or watching YouTube. I don't know what to do with the additional time, so I grab the easiest and most convenient thing nearby. It's even affecting my sleep, and because of that, I'm consistently sleep-deprived and tired throughout the day. I simply don't have the motivation or drive to do my schoolwork.

What now?

To start with, I have to stop letting those activities eat into my sleep time. Those hours of sleep are crucial to my well-being and the rest of my day. The other thing I should work on is being realistic with my time and energy throughout the day. Today I was planning on getting a bunch of work done on campus and then going to the gym, but thinking about it now I don't know if I have the energy for that and would probably benefit more from some reflecting, journalling or reading. At the same time though, I'm unsure if I ever have the energy for the work I need to do and think that maybe I need to push myself to do it regardless. But there's this strong resistance towards it, and I'm not sure why; there must be something else I can do that would benefit my current state more.

Yeah, reading some articles or blogs about the problems I'm facing now would likely help with what I can do to change things. Although reflecting on it now, I guess the first step is wanting to change things, and I'm not even sure if I want to change things. The path I'm taking at the moment is the path of least resistance. It's easy and full of dopamine, and that's exactly why it's so hard to escape from.

The plan moving forward

Here's the idea: start incorporating more self-care habits in my daily routine. This will help to alleviate stress and mitigate the cumulative burnout I'm currently experiencing. What does this look like? Probably a walk in the park, reading for 15-30 minutes, or meditating for 10-20 minutes. Maybe eventually some cardio, like running or biking across town, or something else that gets me outside and using my body. The 2nd part of my plan is better time management and time-blocking. I should start using the tips I learned from Atomic Habits and Deep Work to my advantage by writing down how I will spend the day, letting myself focus on one thing at a time, and reflecting at the end of the day on how it went. This will be crucial in getting my work done even if I don't feel like doing it, and also having clear boundaries between work time and personal time, reducing feelings of guilt when playing video games.

Heck, I'll make it public how the routine is going by incorporating this blog into my daily routine. I'll try to write a blog every day, being consistent with it this time, using it to reflect on how the day has gone and the degree to which I've been implementing these ideas.

So I guess I'll see you tomorrow! Wish me luck on my journey, I'm going to need it!